Now, I’ve been prepping info for a baptism class for my church. Studying the history of baptism, why we baptize and what not. And of course,  an intense discussion is always centered around paedo vs credo baptism. For you non-Bible geeks, paedo-baptism is when you baptise children despite their age and active public confession of faith. Credo-baptism where you only baptize people who have made a confession of faith.

For my whole Christian life, I’ve been a credo guy. My logic was this: If baptism is about taking your confession of faith public, how can someone who’s “faith” is purely shaped by their parents and no real confession of their own yet take this faith public?

 But now I’m considering another question, and I’d love to hear from both sides on this: Why is it we believe that children can pray in faith privately and God will honor and respond, but those same children can’t receive the public sign of that faith via baptism?

Thoughts?

For me, its different. The things that I’m discovering and wrestling with are stretching me greatly but even more so taking my relationship with God deeper. I make no bones about it, I’m exploring the “reformed theology” because I want to know God better. Period. I want to be a better Jesus lover and better people lover. I don’t believe that I’m “actually” saved now because I’m discovering and desiring God in new ways. I think God saved me 13 years ago at a youth service in that field house (fancy name for a gym) at Word of Faith International Christian Center. I loved God as much as I knew then. I believe God was working through that lens to shape me, grow me, develop me, etc. Now, as I learn to see God in what appears to be a clearer way I’m GROWING in Him. I won’t smack God in the face and tell Him He wasn’t at work all those years and NOW He’s saved me and maturing me. He saved me then, whether I thought it was  synergisitc or monergistic. If God was the one doing it, did it matter what I thought at the time? I gave Him the glory for it now I see it more clearly.

So, as I study the reformed theology (which if it is the clearest and best way know and love God – is it really reformed theology or just theology? That’s a discussion for a MUCH later day), I do it so that I can love God more and see Him more clearly. That’s it. I don’t do it to follow the trend. I don’t do it so that Acts 29 would accept me one day. I don’t do it to be a part of the Xian it-boy club. I do it because I want to love God more.

I probably won’t ever smoke a cigar with you. I probably won’t like your brand of music. I probably won’t read that book. I probably won’t EVER  like UFC (boxing > UFC -what!?!?!!). I’m not trying to get into your subculture for your acceptance.

I just want to know and love God better. So whether its TULIPs or daffodils, I pray that you discover GOD for who He is and love Him more and more.

Something that has been and continues to be an issue for churches across America in dealing with youth and single people is the complex and messy issue of dating. EVERY youth pastor, pastor, young adults leader, cultural architect, high-priest of spiritual progress or whatever they want to call themselves wrestle with this issue. Countless books have been written, conferences held, summits attended and videos created about how to address the issue of dating. Books like “How I Kissed Dating Goodbye” – honestly this title made me gag when it came out.

Some of the common conclusions church leaders lead to people to are: “dating is practicing divorce,” “dating is settling for less than God’s best,” and “You should court, not date.” And then they dig deep into the scriptures to support their cases and provide evidence of why dating is ultimately a sin. Do they ever SAY dating is a sin? Not directly. But divorce is and “less than God’s standard” is a sin. I mean we the common explaination of Romans 3:23 is broken into modern english to say “we all have sinned and fall short of God’s standard.” So by these depictions of dating, we are sold that dating is a sin.

Boulderdash. That’s how I feel about the whole issue. Boulderdash. A made up idea that does not come from God’s word. Maybe its a way to curb fornication? But how many people do you know that are having sex with people that they aren’t dating? Quite a few, no?

There is a findamental problem with using Old Testament stories of courting and marriage and translating them into our culture – we don’t arrange marriages anymore! When I got married, (and yes my wife and I dated and still do date each other) I didn’t have to kick in 40 goats and a barn of wheat to marry her. Chances are, neither did the pastor who married his wife. Today we PICK who we marry and they are not chosen by our parents to settle a debt or make peace between warring tribes or kingdoms. The OT gave us insight to lives of kings and people of means in just about every situation involving marriage. So these, while they illustrate other great times of God’s work, do not translate as principles for the modern Christian. These things are “described” but not “prescribed.”

How do you address the topic then? In my city its important as the average Newporter is a 35 year old single person. (52% of community is unmarried, average age 35)  Not to mention the thousands of people under the age of 18 and are exploring the ideas of love and relationships. Here’s how I approach it.

1. (All ages) – Focus on you and God FIRST! If you are not stable as a single person you will not be complete or stable in a relationship either. I tell people learn to be “single.” There is a difference between a single $1 bill and 4 quarters. If you tear the corner off of a $1 bill, while marred it is still a dollar bill and holds its full value. If you remove a quarter from a set of 4 it is now only worth 75 cents. Learn to be SINGLE first and focus on your relationship with God.

2. (If they’re secure enough in God to date – yes, “date!”) Keep the biblical principles of personal relationships front and center. “Don’t be unequally yoked…” If this person doesn’t share the one thing of the most importance with you – God  and continued, joyful fellowship with Him – then you’re headed in a place that doesn’t honor God. Can you be “happy” with an unbeliever? Sure. It happens all the time. But is the ultimate source of our joy receiving joy and pleasure from us simultaneously? NOPE!

After that, any advice on dating has to come from a place of trust. You have to be involved in their lives and understand who they are in order to speak clearly to the issue for them. If they are underaged, their parents HAVE to have BIG influence on your opinion. If mom says no dating until 18, then what you say doesn’t matter. If mom says anything goes, then your insight with them HAS to come from a place of fellowship and trust or they will follow some misguided advice from their parents to their own peril. If they trust that you have their best intentions in mind then you have A LOT OF equity to use in your advice giving. And if they are on their own, this also plays a key role. Sometimes you have to tell them the truth (“You have trouble keeping your legs closed. You need to be single for a while”) and the grace you use to tell that truth has to be leveraged in relationship with them or you’ll come off as too harsh or too soft and either way sound advice would go unheard.

So, pastors make sure you are teaching balanced biblical truth and not just your personal convictions because you left a meeting with a teenager who got pregnant and you need to make sure it never happens again. Because eventually, they’ll found out that what you said isn’t REALLY what’s in the Bible. And the results of that may be even worse…

One thing that I’m noticing is both of these said “camps” heavily emphasize one thing over everything else. Unfortunately, at least in their communication and probably very unintentional, these things have been elevated even more than God Himself. Again, atleast in the communication of them.

For me, this messy journey I’m on is to know and love God better. My experience in the faith camp only brought me so far because of their particular emphasis and I’m afraid that the reformed camp is inadvertantly doing the same thing. What am I getting at you ask? Allow me to explain.

I believe, completely by accident, the faith camp has elevated “faith” and the “teachings of faith” higher than God. Its like we should worship faith because faith is the ultimate. Their is more emphasis to point us to faith than it is to point us to Jesus. Jesus has become a footnote to the teachings of faith and not vice versa. Likewise, I think the reformed camp – also completely by accident – buts more emphasis on grace and the gospel than they do about God.

Are faith, grace and the gospel important? ABSOLUTELY! Without faith you can’t please God. Without grace you can’t come to God. The gospel is the power of God unto salvation. These are all emmensely important issues. But it seems like people are elevating them more than God. And I only say that purely based on the amount of air time these topics get in sermons, books, conferences, tweets, songs, etc. (I mean a song like “What FAITH can do” is limited because its not about what FAITH can do, its about what GOD can do, ya feel me?)

When reformed cats critique (and it seems like the new crop of Calvinists REALLY enjoy doing that), they usually say “but it doesn’t bring you back to the ‘gospel.’” Okay, but even if it does, isn’t that a short-coming as well because it should point back to Jesus.

What do you think? Have certain camps elevated their doctrines beyond the One who the doctrines should point to or are we just so excited to learn something new that we’re caught up in it? Or could it be neither and there are just loads of people in both “camps” that are more concerned with being right than actually knowing and loving God?

Thoughts?

Thoughts?

The thing on my mind lately has been the whole “seed faith” thing that people preach. If you’re not familiar with it, allow me to summarize it for you. If you sow a seed (give money) God will give you what you’ve been believing for (more money, a new car, healing, salvation for a family member, a new house etc) Generally, for this to work, the seed must be planted in “good soil” – meaning people or ministries that are “blessed” (translation – people who already have it or places that are doing some really big stuff)

Giving money so that God will do something in return. Can someone explain to me the difference between this and the old (and now rejected) practice of Catholic indulgences?

I’m late to the side hugging party but this makes me angry on every level.Yes…angry.

Level 1. The message: I got saved in side huggin’ youth church. (A mega side huggin youth church at 500 strong, but a side huggin one all the same) There the ideology of front huggin is sin because its not God’s best for your life. And the oft used “How long will you hold hot coals to your chest” verse was thrown around freely. uhhhh, front hugging is a sin? Really? Unless she’s got D cups or larger (and not a size 20 pants) or you’re a perv side huggin doesn’t matter. I knew all the side hugging student leaders that were banging the girls they were side hugging so IT DIDN’T MATTER! The side huggin sex is the sin not the side hug.

2. The music: GARBAGE!!!!!

3. The method: Now, this might seem a bit over the top but here me out. Everytime I see a white suburban church do homegrown hip-hop, I get nervous. Not because I think it won’t be good, but because since its not their culture and therefore will be goofy at best and pertuating racial and cultural stereotypes at worst. If you want to reach hispanics, you don’t get a white guy to speak in a spanish accent and put “o” at the end of every word and call it using the spanish culture to reach people, do you? Of course not. Why? Because its ignorant at best and racially insensitive if not flat out racist at worst. I see stuff like the Side Hug and see them with the bandanas, baggy clothes, silly “rap” movements, gun shots and hardcore mexicans standing in the background and I’m just ugggggggghhh about it. I think its VERY unintentional but VERY much like the black face comedy sketches of the early and mid 20th century. “That’s what we do boo” WHAT?!?!?! Who do you call boo in Napa Valley, CA (where this was filmed)

I know that’s a hardline to take after the whole Deadly Vipers thing but I’ve been seeing this FAILED attempt at contextualization and others like it and I just get mad.

I wonder if the follow up to this is “Gimme dat Christian Man Hug” because two armed hugs from men are homosexual….

People sometimes ask me if I’m a “faith” guy because of the church I got saved in and the school I went to. I got saved a megachurch in Detroit more known for its prosperity leanings and I got my ministry training at the epicenter of the faith/prosperity movement in Oklahoma – RHEMA Bible Training Center. (A training that has benefited me MUCH during my years in ministry) But, because I’ve spent a lot of time in that movement, I have also seen the good, bad and ugly of the movement. I think the movement gets the characature treatment and is occassionaly unfairly portrayed. BUT, I also believe some of its core statements and beliefs are either extra-biblical or counter-biblical.

Of the many people I’ve seen abandon the expression of their beliefs via hip-hop, many of them have expressed the same thing as reason they quit: “It didn’t work.” I’d ask them “what didn’t work?” and they respond with “The whole thing. I do this thing for Jesus, I prayed, I sacrificed, I gave, I did everything they said I should do and it didn’t work. I’m still broke.” And I’m not talking about people who put out a mixtape and hoped it went platinum. I mean people who WORKED HARD. That got me thinking…

…it made me think about what was about what they believed that “didn’t work?” And the answer was the same. They believed that if they did it for Jesus and worked hard at it and gave sacrificially, God will bless them for it. They believed God was required to do it. Why would they believe that? Because that’s what they were taught via the prosperity “gospel.” They believed the line “What’s good news for the poor? That they don’t have to be poor no more!” But after all of their hardwork and ACTUALLY MAKING GOOD MUSIC, they were still poor. Borrowing money to pay the light bill. Riding in a beat up car they had to get because their other car – that only cost $300 per month anyway – got repoed. For them, it didn’t work.

Now, I’m not part of the neo-Calvinist movement but I do believe in a balanced, biblical view of scripture. In reality, these men and women put their hope in God via this unbiblical view of Him and what He would do for them if they had enough faith, prayed and worked hard. Then, when it didn’t work, it made them think this whole Jesus thing just might be a farce.  And maybe its not a farce, but if that’s the way its presented is and if that’s the way it must be presented – then “I quit” is how they deal with it.

The prosperity “gospel” is killing the Christian rap (that term again….ugh!!!!) star. They have a false hope that will most likely not happen on those terms because God is not REQUIRED to do it. This just reminds me of the comment a theologian once said: “the greatest thing man can do is to see God rightly.” If these people had seen God rightly,they might still be helping other people to see Him and to Him rightly as well.

What do you think? Feel free to comment (this is gonna get messy)

I’m 29 years old and I was RAISED on a steady diet of 80′s and 90′s pop culture. People pass me those pop culture quizes on Facebook – “How well do you know sitcoms” – and stuff like that and I KILL them. I grew up in the era of the Cosby Show, A Different World, 227, Family Matters, Fresh Prince of Bel Air and ABC After School Specials.

In 30 minutes, we would see the genesis of a personal struggle, problem and disastrous moral failure and by the end of the show the patriarch of the family, school guidance counselor or teacher would sit the young person down and show them the error of their ways and add a little anecdotal lesson on the end and VOILA! LIFE CHANGE! By the next episode they are off and living productive lives. At the end of the after school special, the person went to be a motivational speaker, president of their company or something extraordinary like that.

But secretly, these ideas gave me (and maybe you too) a false idea about what I would be doing later in life. I’ve seen the young person caught up in silly living, a tough situation and a disastrous failure. I sat them down and showed them the error of their ways and gave some anecdotal life lesson in the end. We cried, hugged and went our separate ways. But in our next episode, they high again. In our next episode she got pregnant. In our next episode he was back in a gang. In our next episode she dropped out of school. Our next episode was worse than the beginning of our last one.

I started asking myself “What’s going on?!?!?” I did what I was supposed to do. I told them. I sat them down. I told my anecdotes. We prayed and it STILL didn’t work. But that’s how Bill Cosby did it…

But Theo and Vanessa aren’t in our churches. One talk, one story, one shot…it won’t create the life change we’re looking for.  – developing followers of Christ growing to be more like Him – isn’t done in one shot. Its life on life, day after day, prayer after prayer after prayer.

We all KNOW this in our heads but hopefully you, like I had to seriously do, had to examine this in my heart. This ain’t the Cosby Show- its life. And life is messy…

I FULLY agree with the Deadly Viper guys about radical grace (that’s a messy topic all by itself) but at what point is cool kick someone out of your circle, relationship and (more specifically) your local church?

So, I’d love to hear from everyone but specifically church leaders – when is it cool just to throw someone out and “turn them over to Satan?” Have you ever had to do it? Why? What was the aftermath?